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The Soft Machine

A story. It’s not about narcissism or OCPD, but I don’t mind if that’s your take on it. This is about a neurodevelopmental disorder entailing a lack of reciprocity, including empathy. You might know how I’ve struggled with my partner, the (cough) feminist ally, ordering me around, treating me like a servant. Sitting me down […]

Let the autist learn from your mistakes

It’s a misnomer to call the ASD husband non-reciprocating. Oh I get it, tennis-ball messages, easily tossed and caught in a pleasant back-and-forth, are more like eggs thrown against a glass wall. We ask about his day, get an accounting, then hear no inquiry about ours. So we run to his end of the table […]

Well things have been mum without the dum-dum blog

I can’t seem to speak the language. So, back to the place I materialize when I’ve been deleted from somewhere else. I have a feeling I’ll be paying for this blog in perpetuity. It aint rite. What’s wrong with respectful disagreement and open dialogue? Nothing, it stimulates thought, unless you’re a dadgum barking dogmatist, ruining […]

Both Sides Now

Yahoots. Yesterday was Autism Awareness Day and the one-year anniversary of this blog. The Autism Awareness v. Autism Acceptance battle played out in the minds of neurodiversity activists on Twitter as expected. Hundreds of polarized tweets. It’s not like we could have both, awareness and acceptance of course, that’s a gray area. We’re dealing with […]

Rust Never Sleeps

I’m watching True Detective again, and this minor scene reminded me how it used to be with my partner and me. Rust (Matthew McConaughey) is basically me against the neurodiversity counseling industry (played by Woody Harrelson). As I say, we’re getting passed this now. He’s learning to suspend judgment and I no longer feel put […]

Self-stigma? Leave it to the Autist

It rankles me, but I give in. Let the neurodiversity movement keep their identity first autism. While I’m at it, they can take my secondhand autism and I’ll go back to being a full-on allipstick. My Version of Backing Down Besides, I’ve decided the comorbidities that come with autism are what we talk about when […]

This fucking year

…the song is romantic with a desperate, pleading quality that makes you feel both leery of, and sorry for, the speaker. It starts off accusatory, leading you to believe that the speaker has been stood up: “When I was waiting in a bar, where were you? / When I was buying you a drink, where […]

Nose-diving on Reddit

The idea was to replace an open, above-ground ASD/NT group forum that a moderator impulsively killed two weeks ago. Sadly, when a Reddit sub goes away so do all its members and the connections being built between them, day by day. Ghosted, though they may have posted hundreds of times on the ASPIE/NT sub, their […]

Why build community on Reddit

I’m jazzed about a new venture that just fell into my lap. It appears I killed a worthwhile subreddit today, run by clowns. First I got banned then it went dark, I didn’t set out to do it, in fact, I would have saved it if I could but it was corrupt to the bone. […]

Help your Aspie get over some shit

Happy Halloween. No more horror stories about the ASD partner who settles into a well-worn rut, vegetating, going through the motions, flatlining. Perhaps all this (exhaustion?) comes from a need to eliminate distractions due to sensory overload. But if you don’t ask your partner if he has fireworks shooting off multiple tracks inside his head […]

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